I'm not human

You say that everyone should be able to take a joke. Any joke. As long as you mean nothing by it. You say that it makes people human to be able to laugh at themselves.
Well. I'm not human.

I can't sit a whole three hours getting attacked (falsely, or whatever) by my closest friends. I can't stand the fact that they are trying to break me. It doesn't matter that they actually want me to burst into laughter. Laughing at myself. They are still trying to make me do it. I don't know why I hate it, but I simply do. I don't like when a couple gangs up and tries to make fun of my opinions or something actually trivial.

I can't stand it.

And it's happened so many times before. I will not change. I will not go human. I will not laugh at my own expense like that, not when it's not a choice, I have to be able to choose it myself. Nor will I scream out and say "You're such a shit head". I simply go quiet.

And yes, you can apologize, but it doesn't matter. The person who deals with this is me. Sorry, this BEING is me (I just said I wasn't human, so maybe I should stick to that story).

I'll be over it, I say. And I will. I let it go in a few hours, or a few days. As long as it doesn't happen too soon again. As long as you don't step on my foot too soon, I'll be alright.

But I do remember thinking when I hadn't said much for like half-an-hour; "This is why I don't get close friends. This is why".

Because they always end up hurting you, and they don't even consider it hurting. Someone read my diary once, of course without asking. I will never forget that. That betrayal.
I will forget the small things you said, but it's just tiring, you know, tiring and frustrating.

Wait...can I feel frustrated if I'm not a human being?